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Track: (The Legend Of) Miss Baltimore Crabs
Artist: Michelle Pfeiffer
Album: Hairspray (Soundtrack To The Motion Picture)

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Name: Michelle Pfeiffer
Spotify Genres: musicals
Followers: 16,879
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Biography

Michelle Marie Pfeiffer ( FY-fər; born April 29, 1958) is an American actress and producer. One of the most bankable stars in Hollywood during the 1980s and 1990s, her performances have earned her numerous accolades, including a Golden Globe Award and a British Academy Film Award, as well as nominations for three Academy Awards and a Primetime Emmy Award. Pfeiffer began her acting career with minor roles in television and film, before securing her first leading role in Grease 2 (1982). She achieved wider recognition for her breakthrough performance as Elvira Hancock in Scarface (1983), which brought her mainstream success. This was followed by leading roles in The Witches of Eastwick (1987) and Tequila Sunrise (1988). Pfeiffer received the first of six consecutive Golden Globe Award nominations for Married to the Mob (1988). She earned consecutive Academy Award nominations for Dangerous Liaisons (1988), for Best Supporting Actress, and The Fabulous Baker Boys (1989), for Best Actress, winning a Golden Globe Award for the latter. Established as one of the highest-paid actresses of the 1990s, Pfeiffer starred in The Russia House (1990) and Frankie and Johnny (1991). In 1992, she portrayed Catwoman in Batman Returns, and received her third Academy Award nomination for Love Field. She went on to appear in The Age of Innocence (1993) and Wolf (1994). Through her production company, Via Rosa Productions, she produced and starred in several films, including Dangerous Minds (1995). Pfeiffer reduced her workload in the 2000s to focus on her family, appearing in select projects such as What Lies Beneath (2000), White Oleander (2002), Hairspray, and Stardust (both 2007). Following a hiatus, Pfeiffer returned to prominence in 2017 with roles in Where Is Kyra?, Mother!, and Murder on the Orient Express. That same year, she received her first Primetime Emmy Award nomination for portraying Ruth Madoff in the television film The Wizard of Lies. In 2020, she earned her eighth Golden Globe Award nomination for French Exit. Since 2018, Pfeiffer has portrayed Janet van Dyne in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, beginning with Ant-Man and the Wasp.

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Source: MusicBrainz

LYRICS

Front step, cha-cha-cha, back step cha-cha-cha, side step, front step, back, and turn.
Oh my god, penny, there's link, link! I can't believe I'm really here auditioning!
I can't believe I'm really here watching you audition!
Front step, cha-cha-cha, back step cha-cha-cha, side step, front step, back, and, oh, amber, look at this motly crew! Oh
This town has sure gone downhill since I was crowned miss...
Oh, mother not more ancient history!
Oh, my god how times have changed, these girls must be blind, or completely deranged!
But, time seem to halt when I was Miss Baltimore Crabs.
Amber, that move is far too dirty!
Mother, wake up from that dream of yours, this isn't 1930!
You can laugh, but life's a test!
Don't do this, don't do that!
Remember, mother knows best!
And the crowns in the vault from
When I won Miss Baltimore Crabs
These steps are perfect ammunition.
Let me show you how you mommy dear
Took out the competition.
Girls, go get them, boys lets rumba!
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,
Those poor runner ups
Might still hold some grudges
They padded their cups
But I screwed the judges! Those broads thought they'd win if a plate they would spin in their dance..hahaha..not a chance
Boys, put me down!
Oh, good morning ladies, lets see what you got!
Twist, twist, twist, twist, mashed potato, mambo!
Ready, begin
On my show you'll never find a thrusting hip or bump and grind!
Whats that, a dance for flees and tics?
Oh, you should have seen my bag of tricks!
Oh I hit the stage
Batons ablaze
While belting aida
And preparing souflees!
But that triple somersault
Is how I clinched Miss Baltimore Crabs!
Proceed.
Are you scared we're on live?
No, I'm sure I can cope.
Well, this show isn't broadcast in
Cinema scope!
I never drink one chocolate malt
No desserts for Miss Baltimore Crabs!
This one will never get a date in those hand-me-down clothes!
Ha kid, she'll never get a date
Till daddy buys her a new nose!
I would say
Oy gevalt!
If I wasn't Miss Baltimore Crabs
Do you dance like you dress?
Amber, there's no need to be cruel
Would you swim in an integrated pool?
I sure would! I'm all for integration! It's the new frontier!
Not in Baltimore, it isn't!
And may I be frank
First impressions can be tough
And when I saw you I knew it
If your size weren't enough
Your last answer just blew it!
And so my dear
So short and stout
You'll never be in
So were kicking you out!
With your form and your fate
Oh, it isn't your fault!
Just down with a case of
Miss Baltimore Crabs
Ergh you may go
Ummm...thank you?
I think they secretly liked you!
May I please audition?
Of course not
But you can bow and exalt
Cause' I am Miss Baltimore Crabs!
Crabs, crabs, crabs